Colossal

by Levi Fuller

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1.
Colossal 05:10
Our inky clouds defy you. Our kingdom is greater than yours. Our beaks are sharp as a razor. Our brains are bigger than you. We are colossal, and you will never find us. You consume our brothers, But you won't find us no matter how you try. And if you do it will be one on one; One on one we will destroy you. Because we are colossal, and you will never find us. Why don't you pick on someone your own size?
2.
After you died, I talked to your brother longer than I ever had. We walked all around the Mall of America while we were waiting to fly home. I wasn't afraid, he wasn't afraid, to talk about anything. We talked about you; we talked about America; we both tried to understand. Once in a while I treat my family like people Once in a while I act like a man I finally see my family as people I hope they can see me as a man After you died, I talked to your brother longer than I ever had. I wish that you'd been there; I wish that you could have seen what wouldn't have happened if you had lived. I wish that you'd been there; I wish it was you instead. I never got to have that with you. After you died, I talked to my uncle the way I wish I could've talked to you. We walked all around the Mall of America, and we did our best to honor you.
3.
Every day the pigeons come. They come and I give them food. Every day the pigeons come. They come instead of you. I've been sitting here for weeks; I feed them every day. I have been so generous, But still I have no friends. I have got a problem: I just don't know how to talk To members of my species any more. Every day the mailman comes. I stare at him blankly. I wish I had something to say; He might be the only guy I see today. Sometimes when I'm lonely (Lonelier than usual), I mail myself a package Just so he can bring it to my door.
4.
I have craved perfection And the oblivious bliss of your kind All these years. Thank you For delivering me From this poisonous world of pain. And now I surrender myself to the sea. Now I surrender myself, your barb in my heart. Your sacrifice was not in vain, my brother. I go now to a better place, Even if no place at all.
5.
6.
The first time that I saw you, You left some crumbs for me. At first I was so thankful; You'd been so very kind. The second time I saw you Was when you saw me too. You seemed a little angry; You yelled and stamped your feet. Watch me run into your house like a mouse on fire. Watch me burn your house down; I'm a mouse on fire. How could I know You didn't want me in your home? You made it so inviting, So big and warm and full of food. And then you went and grabbed me And held me by the tail And threw me in those burning leaves; That's when I ran like hell. Watch me run into your house like a mouse on fire. I will burn your house down; I'm a mouse on fire.
7.
I remember when I realized that I would die. Needless to say, it gave me pause. Despite my years of Catholic school, I don't believe It led me any further down that path. It's just like Santa, People. Time to move on. It's just like Santa; Time to write it off. I don't remember deciding there was no god. I don't recall believing at all. Unlike Santa, who I would have sworn by once. Unlike Santa, who I would have died for. Remember how the older kids would look at you? Remember how they talked behind your back? That's how I'm looking at you now. I'm talking to you.
8.
Seaplanes 05:07
When I saw the seaplanes Flying over the stage, I couldn't help but wonder If they would fly into my chest. I lay back on the grass and I tried to relax, But there is no way of knowing any more If these things will pass. You were so far away. I looked up at the Needle And I tried to clear my mind, But I couldn't help but see it falling down And crushing everybody there.
9.
I have a friend Who said to me: "If you're cool to bears, Then they'll be cool to you." I don't know if that's true, But I wish it were. If not for a bear, Then at least for your body. Now I know this isn't true: Not for a bear, Not for a man, Not for your body.

about

Available in vinyl form (with free download) at:
Knick Knack Records: knickknackrecords.com/products/levi-fuller-colossal

credits

released October 27, 2009

Recorded and mixed by Casey Alexander
Mastered by Kevin Bressler
Written and performed by Levi Fuller, except as noted
Cello: Ki Johnsen (composed by James Nixon)
Cover art by Scott Bilstad

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all rights reserved

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